Living Damage

 Welcome and welcome back to my usual "long overdue" blog.

Kalini aku nak share dekat korang sort of my personal notes yang aku tulis masa aku mula mula masuk kampus UUM as student asasi masa semester kedua. It was terrifying to meet new people and even to know them cause aku bukan seorang yang pandai socialize tbh. So, this time round punya write up boleh dikatakan dah diperam lama jugalah, created on 19/12/2021 [4:49 pm] and last modified on 19/12/2021 [5:35 pm]. I believe this might not useful for few of you guys but might be the one you refer back one day. Personally I think that we all been through some personal trauma in a lot issues and this personal notes somehow the most personal feeling I can show to people so here goes another version of "my inner voice" : 

Living Damage

It’s nice seeing new friends and new people in my whole new life. It has been awhile since I went out to see this world and experience new things. Past few years I’ve been staying in my own comfort zone peacefully with less drama and live my life happily. There are times where I felt terrible for ruining my past life, times where I blame myself for not doing well in everything I did. Afterall it has been a hell of a journey. A journey that I totally missed. A journey that I totally cried for it. A journey where I F(UP) most of things. A journey that taught me the feelings of regret and pain. Somehow I wish everything to be as simple as it can. I always admire simple life. Sometimes I questioned myself, will this journey ends here or there will be another tough journey that I couldn’t bare?

 

Now, today, Im right here. A place where I am writing this sort of notes. All the feelings coming inside me. All of it literally. It is a mix feelings in knowing new people, having new friends and have to know few particular person in this new life chapter of mine. Praise to Allah who give me this opportunity to still live in His creation of world. To destine where I belong today. I am really thankful and as well grateful to be in this journey to be honest.

 

Eventhough making friends and socialize with new people is not my forte, but I really will try my best to make new friends as much as I can. I promise to myself to not F(UP) this journey one more time as what I did to my past journey. I really want to be someone new and bring up the best version of myself in this whole new life. It is not as simple as I think surely. But, I will try my best.

 

To everyone who knew me or just know me, I would like to say a big warm HI to you guys and I really hope we can be a good friends to each other. This is not a journey I can face alone. Learning from my past mistakes, literally, friends are who we need most in a challenging life. I cannot stand by myself and REALLY.

 

To myself,

 

I know ‘we’ can do this together. Forget all the past heartbreak and start a new mentality.

I know ‘we’ have been through quite a tough times together.

‘We’ really want this escape from home and past life to start a new life.

‘We’ have been through a lot of trauma shit and few other things that ‘we’ cannot describe

 

But,

We Can Do This,

Love Yourself,

Don’t think to much

Wishing you the best and keep manifesting.